Lose Yourself
by The Genius Mage
Summary: It was an evening of laughter and music and realizations that hit Terra one after another, like a rock avalanche. Or maybe like the cascade of a waterfall? "Would you like to dance?" TerraxAqua, Terqua, minor BBS spoilers.


_~*Lose Yourself*~_

_For the moment, at least, he felt like she was his entire world._

_~***~_

The interior of the Castle of Dreams was decorated lavishly. Gold and green garland festooned every corner of the large, circular white room. The floor was patterned with ivory and yellow diamonds, each tile about a foot wide and tall. Refreshment tables coated with hordes of luxury food and drinks were flattened to the wall, whereas the middle of the room was left clean and empty. A veritable legion of servants waited to attend to anyone that cared to ask, and an orchestra on a raised platform merrily played away, the elegant song flowing perfectly from note to note, beat to beat. One entire wall was pure glass, showcasing the blackness of the night beyond, stars adorning the black sky like tiny silver embers shed from the departed phoenix that was the sun.

Of course, the main focus was the dancers. They twirled and pivoted in tune with the music, couples smiling dreamily at their partner's faces, laughing and talking and blushing and smiling.

Terra scowled, calloused fingers squeezing the glass tighter. He sipped the red drink absently, not caring what it was, leaning against the wall and glaring at a butler of some sort that had scurried closer, thinking he might want a refill. Honestly, the warrior was bored. Out of his _mind_. He'd rather challenge a brigade of Unversed whilst in a dark room than sit here with these stupid partying guests in this stupid magical world.

He had almost completely forgotten his companion; she had been totally and entirely silent.

"Terra?"

He tore his eyes from his drink, spotting Aqua just a few feet away from him. "What?" He tried to keep the boredom out of his voice.

"I…nothing." She turned back to the partygoers, clenching her fists over her chest and sighing. She rocked a little on the armored heels of her boots.

Terra shrugged, staring straight at one of the servants until she refilled his glass. In retrospect, he thought he had probably scared that poor butler out of his mind earlier. Oh well. He stepped to Aqua's side—she didn't even stir—idly swishing the red liquid around in its crystal goblet.

They were here for one reason and one reason only: to protect Cinderella. The girl had a _horrible_ case of bad luck, and anyone might decide to pick her off during the ball. True, she was finally reunited with what's-his-face, Prince Phillip was it? Didn't matter. Even if Unversed had already tried to collect her, Aqua had suggested that the pair of them stay until the party was over. Ventus had been here earlier, but the youngest of their trio was nowhere to be seen. Maybe he had left already; maybe he was just hanging out elsewhere. Terra was unconcerned.

He suppressed a sigh, if only for Aqua's sake, eyeing her out of the corner of his vision. He brushed a strand of his earth-brown hair back as casually as he could, since a piece of it was obscuring his view of her face.

Aqua's eyes were visible despite her blue bangs hanging down farther than normal—looked like she was due for another hair cut soon. She looked oddly passive, distracted, her eyes following something with a fierce intensity. It was like watching someone read a book, you could see their eyes moving and could notice how their attention was elsewhere. At first, Terra thought she was looking at a boy, one of the twirling figures around them. He quickly scanned the crowd, wondering with a small twinge of resentment whom had captured her attention. He returned his gaze back onto her face, seeing her eyes were hopping from place to place, not with the studious grace of one looking for trouble either. Aqua was…just staring at the people in general.

Terra's mind, slightly sluggish thanks to the Darkness—it was creeping up but he refused to acknowledge it—and his own weariness, sorted tiredly through the clues. It was obvious, really, and he wanted to plant his palm on his face as soon as the concept clicked.

He was right, she wasn't looking for Unversed. She wasn't staring after some boy. She was watching the _dancers_, tracing their movements with a…longing gaze? Like how Ven looked whenever he found ice cream, a favorite food of his, and Eraqus made him wait until after training to eat it.

_Oh. _Terra rubbed at his hair. It had never occurred to him that she might have wanted to…suddenly her earlier, nervous calling of his name made perfect sense. She wasn't the type to usually ask, but maybe he just didn't know the way her heart worked. She might have a constant mask over her real emotions. Maybe she was like any girl her age and dreamt of a knight in shining armor, a prince, a love story with a happily ever after.

_Build your nerve up, then. This'll cure your boredom and it'll make Aqua happy. What the heck else do you want?_ An unexpected, fierce voice snarled in his head.

_To not embarrass myself. I don't know _how_ to dance._

_Yes, you do. It's like watching Master Eraqus when he was teaching you battle moves. Look at the dancers for a bit, and do what they do._

Terra grimaced but forced himself to pay attention. He stared hard and long, for about ten minutes, at all of the whirling couples. The ball had barely been going on for an hour, he was sure he still had time. These things lasted 'till morning, or so he had heard. Cinderella didn't look like she would stop any time soon anyway, her white dress flowing behind her like a shimmering waterfall. Boys put their hands there; girls put their arms here, twist like that, dip like this, spin and spin and spin and spin…_Stop_ when the music slowed, start again, at a subdued pace…

His mind had kicked back into action at the prospect of what he was about to do, and when he felt reasonably confident enough that he could do it without making a fool of himself, Terra tapped Aqua on the shoulder.

She started guiltily, whipping around so fast that her long sleeves had to take a few moments to catch up with the rest of her body. "What's wrong?" She asked, eyes darting everywhere.

Terra ignored the startled question, folding his arm across his chest and bowing low from the waist in a more flamboyant fashion than their usual gesture to their Master. "Aqua," he was proud to say that his voice didn't tremble a bit, even though his heartbeat was roaring in his ears. "Would you like to dance?" He straightened up, spearing her with his gaze, willing himself to not look away. The more debonair and daring Terra, the voice that had goaded him into dancing with her in the first place, was celebrating his victory in the back of his mind.

Aqua blinked three times, the first two incredibly fast, the last very, very slow. Her deep azure eyes twinkled with a silent _thank you_. "Of course, Terra."

He offered her his hand, and she placed her own in his grip. He carefully closed his fingers, keeping his face composed with only a small smirk, and led her onto the dance floor.

_Courage, don't desert me,_ Terra prayed to whatever Gods existed in this world.

A few curious glances went their way, and Cinderella flashed him an encouraging smile before turning back to Philip, if that was his name. Terra hardly knew the guy. For the most part, the dancers ignored him, and he hoped it would stay that way. Terra squared his shoulders briefly, knowing what was to come, and then relaxed, fighting back a blush as Aqua put her hand on his shoulder. He didn't quite succeed, judging by the faint smile playing on the edges of her lips. He took a deep breath through his nose, letting it out slowly as he placed his hand in turn on her waist. With the other hand, he took hers again; gently squeezing her fingers in what he hoped was a reassuring gesture, trying to hide his uneasiness.

_Deep breaths. It's okay. Just like Eraqus taught you. Deep…slow…breaths…_

Boys led the dance. This he knew. So, as the other couples started to move, Terra did the same, stepping carefully but quickly with the rest, not running into anyone. To an onlooker, he looked composed and somewhat triumphant with Aqua stepping delicately to keep up with him, metal shoes clinking lightly in comparison to the sharp tap of the other women's high heels. Sure, they weren't dressed in evening robes and tuxedoes, but this felt _right_ to them. Or Terra, at least. He didn't feel like himself in anything but his combat gear, and Aqua looked much better in her long sleeved blue outfit than anything else.

To Terra, anyway. He didn't know what she thought.

_Conversation. Oops._

_Casual is the way to go_, the braver Terra in his head suggested.

Reminding himself that it was _never_ healthy to have a voice in his mind other than his own, Terra widened his smirk and softened it into a warm smile. He didn't smile often either, or at least not as frequently as Ven. His face completely transformed with the motion, seeming years younger. "How're we doing?" He asked in a teasing tone.

Aqua laughed quietly, raising her vibrant azure eyes, shining with happiness. "I think we're doing great," she murmured. On instinct, Terra gently twirled her, using the hand he held onto to guide the girl through the motion. She spun, more graceful than the others, with an elegance born from a lifetime of battle training. She continued as if there had been no interruption. "I'm_ impressed_, Terra."

"So am I," Terra grinned. "I haven't stepped on your foot yet." Twirl; spin twice, back to talking. So simple. Some of Eraqus's combat techniques were easier than this. "I didn't think we'd have an Unversed attack tonight…so I decided to do what boys do at balls. Ask pretty girls out to dance." He felt his heart spasm in his chest and he instantly wished he could retract his last sentence.

Aqua blushed, her pale skin turning a light pink. "Thank you. I mean it. I've wondered what it would be like to dance."

"What else…do you wonder about?" Terra inquired nonchalantly.

Her reply was unsure, hesitant, her gaze focusing somewhere in the far past or future. Maybe even the present. "I wonder how this whole adventure will turn out. I wonder where Ven is, how everything is going back home…I wonder about you, too. I'm glad you're okay."

"I'm perfectly fine," Terra answered. _Lie. _He knew the Darkness was clawing at his heart underneath the surface. "As for Ven, Cinderella saw him earlier. I'm sure he's out somewhere doing something exciting and foolish, and then he'll come back miraculously unharmed to tell us all about it." That sort of talk might have made someone else feel worse about the whereabouts and doings of their lost friend, but Aqua knew as well as he did that it was very likely Ven was doing exactly that.

The song ended, and Aqua and Terra paused for a moment to drink something from the refreshment tables. A much slower paced song began, the orchestra easing into the melodic tune with an amazing amount of precision. Fewer couples were willing to brave the song now, since this was _romantic_ music and not just a happy prancing song that induced energetic twirling. It was almost like a high school prom.

_You can dance fast,_ whispered the confident Terra quietly again. _Why not dance slow?_

_Shut _up_. I don't want to._

_Does _she_?_

Terra gritted his teeth briefly, looking like a wolf wanting to rip the throat out of something. He relaxed again, the tension leaving his body. Another hand was extended to Aqua, since he was afraid that someone might actually _ask_ her to dance. No one would dance with her but _him_. Maybe others had been keeping away at first since they thought she was his girl…

_My girl. _The words weren't thought only by the over-the-top Terra that still resided in his head from younger, more inexperienced days. Instead, it was a simultaneous pleasant concept that took root in his mind before he could stop it, and then it _bloomed_, like a flower underneath the sun. _My girl, Aqua._

She gave him a happy smile, and yes, he had been right, she did still want to dance. Terra escorted her back out onto the dance floor, this time swaying at an easier pace to compensate for the different melody, finding it was simpler than he had previously imagined.

_Deep breaths, Terra._

He became lost in his thoughts, his guard down, thinking of the tree still flourishing in his mind.

_My girl, Aqua._

And there was nothing possessive about it, just an unfamiliar feeling that felt as wonderful as breathing after being smothered for so long.

~***~

Aqua looked up—Terra was just a little taller than her after all—and saw her friend appeared distracted. His guard was lowered, completely gone, revealing the levels of emotion that usually remained cloaked in mystery.

He was smiling, eyes creased slightly at the bottom, as if he was fighting back tears. But Terra never cried, so…he was doing the dancing _effortlessly_! She was so impressed and surprised! Aqua, without really thinking since she was too content to let anything bother her save for Ven being in danger or an Unversed attack, placed her head against Terra's chest. His heartbeat was actually thumping slowly and calmly instead of thunderously, almost going in rhythm with their steps.

She closed her eyes, listening to the music and the blessed sound still fighting the Darkness and giving life to her friend. Aqua shoved away all of the thoughts that he had ever done anything _bad_. Not Terra, not _her_ Terra. Not the heart that continued to beat, evenly and strongly.

Aqua had expected him to get nervous, but instead he just continued to rotate with the other dancers.

Terra, her Terra.

~***~  
He wasn't nervous at all. He hadn't even been nervous when Aqua suddenly rested her head against his chest. It was like the elation he had felt at those three simple words—_My girl, Aqua—_had chased away all of his worries.

Terra released her hand again by the tables of food, smiling at her. "Are you happy, now?" Thinking that sounded accusing, he amended hastily, "If not, I'd be more than glad to—"

"No, Terra. It's okay."

"For real, if you want me—"

She placed one finger on his lips, laughing again. "It's fine," she assured him, stepping back and giving him his voice again. "Besides, I—"Her eyes suddenly widened, and Terra whipped around, ready to fight whatever twitchy monstrosity had materialized now.

Instead, striding towards them with an idiotic grin on his young face, was Ventus. He wrapped his arms around Aqua in a hug—burying his face in her shoulder as if he had been gone for ages and had forgotten how she felt—and gave Terra a playful punch that had more force behind it than it used to.

_Wow, he's gotten strong fast._

"Hey guys! How's it going?"

Aqua smiled, and now she looked utterly elated. "It's been going great, Ven. How're you?"

"Fantastic! I went to get some of Cinderella's old stuff for her, though she didn't want me to. Apparently, even if she's gonna be Queen or something, there's some things she doesn't want to lose." The blonde twitched his nose. "Anyway, look at all the partygoers! I wish I knew how to dance."

Terra noticed Aqua's fleeting look in his direction. "Go ahead," he said to her.

"Go ahead what?" Ven looked between Aqua and Terra with a confused expression. Instantly, for no reason Terra could see, he remarked all of a sudden, "You two should go dance! I'll be fine. I've got two left feet, and I move too fast for any girl to keep up."

True, he was the fastest of the apprentices…Terra scowled. Apprentices, and the one Master here with them. He tried not to let the memory sour the moment.

"You're making excuses," Aqua commented, looking at Ven with a small frown.

Ven grinned hugely in response. "Nah." With that, he was gone again before anything could be said, waving to Cinderella as she greeted him happily.

Another song started up, faster, along the same speed as the first Terra had danced to.

He offered her his hand again, for the third time that evening. "Shall we, Miss? I'd be honored if I could have this dance."

Aqua placed her hand in his. It felt right there, to him anyway. "Of course, the pleasure would be all mine," she replied, playing along.

Together, they went back to join the couples in the center of the room. Terra lost himself in the moment, forgetting Xehanort and the Unversed and even the Darkness that waited in the wings for a single error on his part. Aqua moved seamlessly with him, as if they were the same person, needing almost no guidance on any of the steps. Terra never did notice that everyone was stopping to watch the two waltzing warriors that were gliding across the dance floor, too intent on Aqua's eyes.

Completely lost in the moment.

And Ventus, leaning against the wall with one hand curled around the green good luck star charm in his pocket, closed his eyes and smiled.

~***~

_**Right-o. You all know the two my TerraxAqua one-shots are dedicated to. In case you don't…**_

_**This story is dedicated, with everything I have to offer, to both Dani-Chan-Sprite-Monster -13- and Kiome-Yasha. I hope you both enjoyed it.**_

**_Oh, that's right! Inspiration for this story was partially drawn from one of Sasuke-N-Sakura4Ever's stories. Be sure to take a look at her stories too!_**

_**To everyone else, I hope you'll leave a review!**_


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